Talk at or around your partner.

Interrupt, or speak without responding.

Before you move on, confirm you understand what the other person has said.

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Use accusatory you statements.

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4.

Disengage your body or eyes.

Two people’s legs touch under a table as they work on their laptops.

associate therapist at Manhattan Wellness

Add other people into the argument.

Ganging up on your partner is a surefire way to increase their defensiveness.

Apologize when you dont mean it.

Books on grief are seen floating against a backdrop of clouds.

Bring up past gripes.

Stick to the issue at hand to get to keep a conversation from snowballing into a potentially devastating fight.

And this applies to situations both relatedandunrelated to the person with whom youre speaking, saysRachel Holzberg, LMSW.

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Walk away without a resolution.

So long as you feel physically and emotionally safe, aim to stay engaged, says Marks.

This is perhaps the biggest no-no.

Michelle Monaghan, Carrie Coon, and Leslie Bibb in The White Lotus, symbolizing toxic friendships.

associate therapist at Manhattan Wellness

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Courtesy Berkley Publishing