Spectatoring in sex refers to what happens when sexual anxieties get in the way of pleasure.

Experts share tips to stop that from happening.

They are taught that it is embarrassing if theycannot get an erection or last long enough.

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So, theres no surprise that these messages make some men feel anxious about their worth in the sheets.

Societal messaging isnt the only cause of spectatoring.

4 tips to stop spectatoring during sex and start experiencing real-deal pleasure

1.

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sex educator withLoversand co-author ofThe Ultimate Guide To Seduction and Foreplay

In addition to minimizing stressors and practicing deep breathing, Stewart suggests a certain mindset shift.

Make pleasure the goal of your sexual experience, she says.

What is The Missionary Sex Position?

A couple in bed, having an intimate kink experience.

Ask yourself questions (ideally in your head) to concentrate on those feelings.

Some questions she suggests asking include:

3.

What do they look, sound, feel, taste, and smell like?

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What aspects are turning you on?

Youd be surprised by how little others actually notice your perceived flaws.'

She adds that theyre more likely just grateful to be in the situation with you.

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sex educator withLoversand co-author ofThe Ultimate Guide To Seduction and Foreplay

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