Even so, not all versions of taking control or initiation may be turn-ons for the other person involved.
I like to say intimacy is what happens when youre not having sex, says Howard.
And its important to read the room when it comes to leading and being open to being led.
Rethink how you define control.
Broadening your definition of control can make the role feel less intimidating.
What is The Missionary Sex Position?
sexologist, intimacy consultant, and HIV activist
Get the communication flowing.
If youre struggling to get started, enlist some outside help.
Initiating the conversation about sex can feel as tough as initiating sex itself.
Take turns being in control at different points during sex.
In that case, that can be your chance to be the assertive partner.
Tap into your imagination.
Our fantasies are treasure troves of inspiration just waiting to be unlocked, says Howard.
And your partner could have a treasure trove of their own, too.
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sexologist, intimacy consultant, and HIV activist
