When it comes to reacting versus responding, relationship experts say responding is crucial for protecting healthy relationships.

Thats why its crucial for us to keep learning how to keep these interactions healthy.

They reported overreacting emotionally and reflecting in a destructive way.

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Reacting versus responding: Whats the real difference?

Responding means you self-regulate your thoughts and emotions in the moment.

cognitive neuroscientist Caroline Leaf, PhD

Responding, on the other hand, is what Dr.

Two people’s legs touch under a table as they work on their laptops.

neuroscientist, mental health expert, and host ofCleaning Up The Mental Mess

Leaf calls reactings emotionally mature cousin.

3 ways to ensure youre responding, not reacting

1.

You want to learn to relax your system, she says.

Books on grief are seen floating against a backdrop of clouds.

Take your time to calm yourself down, to teach yourself not to react.

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Dr. Breathe in very deeply for three counts and breathe out forcefully for seven counts, she says.

Repeat this two to three times, depending on how stressed you feel.

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After all, if someone feels slighted or disrespected, the communication wont be as effective.

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Michelle Monaghan, Carrie Coon, and Leslie Bibb in The White Lotus, symbolizing toxic friendships.

neuroscientist, mental health expert, and host ofCleaning Up The Mental Mess

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Courtesy Berkley Publishing